If it wasn’t a man’s livelihood and his second (and probably last) crack at coaching at the top level on the line, you’d probably crack a smile at what is occurring at Carlton.
Really, it’s ludicrous.
With just 32 games at the helm, it seems the story is that Michael Voss is now “coaching for his career” at Ikon Park, at least according to Sam McClure, who claims both the board and playing group are questioning Voss’ tenure.
Seriously, he’s barely had time to scratch himself, let alone get things completely right with his team. Sadly, it seems he is joining a growing line of coaches who have come in with high hopes and big dreams, only to have the club and those within it suck the life out of him at every turn.
Coaching Carlton is the worst senior coaching role in footy.
I suppose we shouldn’t feel sorry for Vossy – footy has been great for him. A Brownlow Medal and three flags as captain of the all-conquering Brisbane Lions, he was served his first slice of humble pie after being ousted from the Brisbane coaching job back in 2013.
As students of the game do, he realised he took on too much, too soon, and his next stop saw him taking on an apprenticeship under Ken Hinkley at Port Adelaide in 2015. There, his confidence returned, and when the Carlton job became available, he once again ascended to the role of head coach.
Perhaps holding out for a better gig may have been the wiser option.
Since the Blues sacked Brett Ratten following the 2012 season, they have had a procession of coaches cycle through the place, providing little stability for players and, obviously, none for the assistant coaches and support staff. This creates an environment of self-preservation that is never healthy for a team.
Mick Malthouse was first to feel the Calton wrath, taking over for the 2013 season after Ratten’s departure. Having successful runs at the Western Bulldogs, West Coast, and Collingwood, that saw multiple finals appearances, seven Grand Final appearances, and three premierships, Malthouse was introduced to coaching, Carlton style and immediately seemed out of place. His style clashed with both the playing group and the board… ah yes, the board. We’ll get to them. He lasted 54 games.
Next up, John Barker warmed the seat for 17 games before the vanilla midget, Brendon Bolton took the reins. He lasted 74 games, surprisingly. However, despite his talk of green shoots and player development, he always struck me as someone the players never really respected. It was as though they were being instructed on how to play footy by a bloke who they were used to seeing give out the oranges at three quarter time. The players stopped playing for him (check out Patrick Cripps’ last couple of games before Bolton’s sacking. There is no mistaking what his lack of effort indicated).
So, Bolton was out of there like spit through a trumpet.
Then came David Teague. Toot toot… all aboard the Teague Train! Remember that? Didn’t that go off the rails quickly!
This was a player-led appointment. Teague was popular as an assistant and seemed to have the respect of the players. His job filling in as senior coach was rewarded with the full time gig after the players responded positively to his style. Perhaps they were just happy to see the back of Bolton, right Crippa?
And then, Teague’s honeymoon period wore off, the players suddenly weren’t as into him as they seemed to be before, and like a good/bad date, Teague was screwed and let go simultaneously.
It was clear that Carlton needed an experienced head to deal not only with a playing group that seemed more akin to bunch of sulking children, but to a board that seemed to be a midday drama series that never bloody ends.
Of all the teams in the league, Carlton are the only club I have ever heard that have had their board members described as “powerbrokers”. Have you noticed that? I am sure it has become a media-driven term, but this club, with its money men and “club insiders” seems to believe that their off-field positioning and jockeying are just as important as what occurs on the field. Imagine walking into a coaching position and finding that the players are just a by-product of the squabbling mess that doubles as the board?
That is what awaited Michael Voss when he accepted the role as Carlton coach for the 2022 season, but early signs pointed to him being the man that could play both sides and do the unthinkable – actually win with this fragmented mess of a club.
With a month remaining in the 2022 AFL season, Carlton fans were up and about. Finally, after years of teasing, someone had stepped forward to lead this incredibly talented list back to September. The Blues were going to play finals, baby!
And then the losses came.
A loss to the Adelaide Crows on the road is no great shame. Not this year, but in 2022, the Crows had won just five games up until Round 20. And the Blues shat the bed against them.
Next up was the Lions, who handled the Blues by 33 points at the Gabba. Not to worry, though. They just needed one more win to secure their finals place – all was well.
And then not so well.
A Round 22 loss to the Dees by five points had the Carlton masses on edge
Everything now came down to their final outing of the season, against their hated enemy, Collingwood.
Carlton looked to have done it – eight goals in the third term set up their win. They’d have to shit the bed again to lose it from there, right?
Well, get out the bleach and put the sheets on a hot wash, because Collingwood kicked the last five goals of the game to snatch a one-point win and oust Carlton from the eighth spot on the ladder.
And in that moment, the gloss wore off Voss. He went from the golden boy to yet another tarnished Carlton coach. The board, quiet for the majority of the 2022 season as the Blues won, started to rumble again as success turned to failure. Again.
The 2023 season has followed suit.
Heading into Round 13, Carlton sits 14th on the ladder. With four wins and a draw from 12 games, there are simply no more excuses for this team. They have traded for a mix of players, ranging from very disappointing (Jack Martin, Mitch McGovern) to pretty damn serviceable (Adam Saad, Nic Newman, Adam Cerra) whilst they boast two Coleman Medallists and a Brownlow winner.
Talent has never been the issue with this team.
But is it really the coach that’s the problem? Again?
There is not much anyone can say that will save Michael Voss at Carlton unless this team does a 180- degree turn. Missing the 2022 finals was a black mark against his name. It gave those who thrive on disharmony and drama all the ammunition they needed. They took aim and started firing their shots at will.
As Carlton have continued to disappoint, the board has done what the Carlton board always does – create headlines for the wrong reasons. Arguments in the rooms leading to a resignation… passion is great, but public anger and division; that is something no one wants to deal with, particularly a coach under the pump.
Michael Voss is preparing for his 33rd game in charge of Carlton. The median number coached by the previous four men in charge is just under 49 – it is bumped to 60 if we remove Barker from the equation. Using history as our guide, there is a big chance Voss will be gone from Carlton by the middle of next year if the Blues are not sitting in the top eight at that point. Hell, given the anger and frustration around the team’s performance, it could even be this season if they don’t turn things around.
Carlton do not tolerate failure, yet, they seem to cultivate it with their impatience and impertinence.
Voss is the strong personality the club needed. He is the proven leader with high standards that wants Carlton to follow suit. However, there are those who don’t want to follow. There are those who believe themselves to be leaders – more important than the one genuinely leading the team.
As such, they are content setting him up to fail. And when he fails, they’ll simply blame the coach and move onto the next one. Rinse, repeat, fail again, blame the coach.
There is a lot more riding on their Round 13 game against Essendon this weekend. With black marks already against his name, maybe Sam McClure is right. Maybe Michael Voss is coaching for his career right now. And a loss to the Bombers might be the last straw for a board that doesn’t know what it wants, but has a pretty good idea what it doesn’t want.
If that occurs, who will be next in line to sign up to coach this mob?
Voss has taken on the worst job in footy and whilst I don’t envy his position, I have a feeling he can turn it around if given the opportunity. But I’m not sure more losses will be tolerated as he takes this club forward.
Given what prospective replacements have seen unfold at Ikon Park over the past decade, why the hell would they even contemplate putting their hand up to coach this divided and fractured club.
I sure as hell wouldn’t, especially if I was told I had the full support of the board. I don’t like being lied to.
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