ROUND SIX – WRESTLEMANIA WEEKEND
Well, it’s been yet another week of controversy in AFL Land. We had a player fined because an umpire’s feelings were hurt, but we can’t even confirm that they should have been. We’ve had the AFL go crazy over a kid playing game 100 and almost forget that a two-time Brownlow medallist is playing game 300. And, for some reason, we have two games running semi-adjacently on Friday Night. The league is in a shambles, but let’s hope the matches this weekend aren’t!
Be forewarned, while I am the Mongrel Punt’s resident oracle for all things AFL, I hold no liability for your bad betting and using my predictions in your multis. So, please, gamble responsibly.
So, strap yourselves in for the Prophet’s Predictions for Round Six (and with a smattering of Wrestlemania predictions).
The Guarantee
Hokball produces 25+ goals on Saturday versus the Power. While Port have had moments in games, they tend to concede clearances, and teams can move the ball easily against them. Aliir Aliir has been a defensive wall for the Power, but that cannot go on indefinitely without the dam wall breaking.
The Hawks are in great form; they could have had some even bigger kicks if not for some wayward goal-kicking. So, under the roof (I reckon the threat of rain sees it closed) on a dry deck, they could seriously get a hold of the Power from Port.
At Mania in Sin City, Randy Orton (pronounced Or-TAHN) wins World Title number 15 as there is simply no way TKO allow Pat McAfee’s influence and reach to disappear from WWE and their programming.
The Ultimate Nightmare (Worst Case Scenario)
Oba Femi is squashed by/loses to Brock Lesnar. The WWE have captured lightning in a bottle with Oba Femi and absolutely MUST capitalise by putting The Ruler over Lesnar. Many of the issues with the lacklustre build and others who missed the card will largely be forgotten if Oba wins.
Footy-wise, another umpire controversy happens this weekend. Nick Foote is on the job this weekend, despite the issues last week with Zak Butters. The worst thing for the AFL would be for him or another umpire to be involved in controversy.
The Outsider (unexpected winner)
I’m not really sure I can find an unexpected winner this weekend. I mean, if the Dogs beat the Cats, I see that as a reasonable thing, given the form disparity of both teams thus far, even if the Dogs are missing a few.
I think the closest I can get is the Saints to beat the Crom at Adelaide Oval, meaning that St Kilda do the double, in Adelaide, against the local teams. The Saints have remained in Adelaide this week, so they haven’t needed to travel, and they are playing decent footy. On paper, the Crows should win, but strange things happen when teams aren’t playing at their best. Should be a very interesting watch.
Also, iShowSpeed will become a massive babyface when he turns on the Vision on the opening night of Wrestlemania. He will pull off some ridiculous viral moment, but then ensure that he remains over with fans by turning on his teammates of circumstance.
The Money Maker (Bold Call)
The Demons lead the Lions at three-quarter time, but the Lions “do it for Josh and Lachie” in their milestone games, and run over the top of them.
Now, some of you may think that this is a ludicrous take given the Dees dropped last week to the Bombers. That’s a relatively fair take. I just expect them to respond this week. To start well, get the jump, and then let the Lions chase the game, which is something that they do well.
Essential Result (Must Win)
I think I’ve put North in this category a few times already, and they’ve largely responded well. I’m putting them in again this week as maybe I still don’t trust Norf completely.
They play the winless Richmond. With North going for win number 4 inside six rounds, it’s been a bright start. However, any goodwill that has been generated may fade away if they drop a game like this.
Richmond has been gallant in a few games – they try hard. And despite having some talented young players, their senior core isn’t great, nor is their bottom six. There are positive flashes, but they just aren’t very good at the moment. So, North needs to come and win or it will set them back.
Wrestlemania-wise, it is essential that we get a segment involving John Cena and Danhausen. The fanhausens need to see this. It’d be even better if the Miz gets involved – given he wasn’t included in Cena’s farewell tour, and we get something like Miz v Danhausen as an impromptu match with Cena as guest referee. Very nice, very evil.
Most at Stake (Vulnerable)
If you don’t consume much AFL-related social media, you have missed a bet made between Dan Gorringe and Nick Daicos. The subject of the bet? The result of Thursday night’s Carlton-Collingwood game.
Should the Pies win, then Gorringe is required to get a permanent tattoo of a design of Naicos’ choosing. However, should the Blue baggers win, then Daicos the Younger is required to shave his head. There’s a little bit at stake for these two men, but also for the clubs.
Should the Blues falter again, it will get harder for Voss to keep his job – especially after an improved performance last week and some good reinforcements to the side. For the Pies, though, another loss puts pressure on them the longer the season goes. It’s a very interesting game that could see a winner determined by simply who is the first to kick five goals in the game.
The Must Watch (match-up or game)
Both games on Friday Night.
In 2025, the Cats v Dogs game at Cat Park was an all-time classic. Big bags kicked by the big forwards and classic midfield match-ups. It was high-scoring and fun to watch. Here’s hoping we can get the same again this time round.
The other game, the Battle of the Bridge, always has some spice. The Swans have a dominant recent record over their little brother, so the orange team will want to change that. The Giants got some players back last week, who will be better for the run. This would be a statement win for the Giants and kickstart their otherwise poor start to season 2026, by their own expectations. For the Swans, they can continue to set the benchmark. Their midfield is flying, they have avenues to goal, and when everything finally clicks for Charlie Curnow, they are going to be seriously hard to stop.
It’s just a shame neither of these is standalone. Poor booking, AFL!
What is standalone is the Night Two Main Event, CM Punk versus Roman Reigns. Now, I am unashamedly and unapologetically a fan of the Voice of the Voiceless, CM Punk. Him losing in this one will annoy me. Regardless, I expect some shenanigans, I expect time to be given, and I expect them to tell a very good story in this one. I’m gonna go heart over head and believe that Punk retains the World Heavyweight Championship and gets his first career Wrestlemania Main Event win. We want a full-time fighting champion!
The Unexpected (underdog performance)
I really like the way Mykelti Lefau goes about his footy. After an extended injury layoff, he is starting to hit his stride. He is always up for the contest, finds the goals, and adds some spark and, if I can say it, some mongrel to the Tigers’ forward line. He could go head-to-head with Luke Parker, which would be a lot of fun to watch.
It’s a Big Weekend For …
The WWE Women’s division. Some of their stars are missing from the card, and some of the announced matches need stipulations. So, let’s hope that they can all deliver and show why they deserve the spotlight … expect Stephanie Vaquer and Liv Morgan to have an epic match.
By extension, with a lacklustre build and some controversies, the WWE need a win this weekend and to deliver an all-time Mania.
Footy-wise, the Suns are hard to read. They have stars everywhere, but still seem to struggle on the road. While at home this weekend, they need to win. And win well. They should be reasonably expected to beat the Bombers comfortably. Doing that helps to restore the momentum that is a little wobbly. A close win or a catastrophic loss leaves more questions than answers for the Suns.
The Don (player of the round)
Whoever wins the midfield battle in the Cats v Dogs game. One of Max Holmes, Tom Liberatore, Marcus Bontempelli, or Bailey Smith will be the difference maker and will carry their team across the line in a best on ground performance.
In Vegas, Trick Williams, Je’Von Evans, and Oba Femi. The new guard. Those on whom WWE will rely for the next 20 years.
The Underboss (rookie of the round)
Willem Duursma is getting all the attention – which is fair enough – however, there are some other young blokes playing really well at the Eagles. I like the look of Josh Lindsay. Like all good left-footers, he looks like he has time, he moves well, and he hits the target more often than not. I see a lot of Isaac Smith in Lindsay.
Individual Brilliance (predicting a stat accomplishment like x goals or marks)
A minimum of four ladders will be destroyed in the men’s Intercontinental Title Ladder Match. Beyond that, I like what Josh Treacy has been doing. I almost had him in the Rolling All-Australian Team, but a big game in the Derby could see him stake his claim. 5+ goals for Kahuna Time on Sunday!
The Winners (currently on 29; last week 6)
Carlton (because it’s wet)
Geelong
Sydney
Gold Coast
Hawthorn
St Kilda
North Melbourne
Brisbane
Fremantle
Predictions were made with only the Thursday Night teams available. Drop us your thoughts in the comments and stay tuned over the coming weeks to see how the Prophet goes with his predictions.
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