With one full round in the books, there are more questions than answers. As for the Prophet, well, a “wizard is never late, Frodo Baggins. He arrives precisely when he means to.” Or, in this case, a Prophet doesn’t forget to submit his article; he releases it when the stars align. That doesn’t mean his predictions are any less on point or shambolic. Who knows which one this week will be?
Be forewarned, while I am the Mongrel Punt’s resident oracle for all things AFL, I hold no liability for your bad betting and using my predictions in your multis. So, please, gamble responsibly.
So, strap yourselves in for the Prophet’s Predictions for Round Two.
The Guarantee
Friday Night Footy at Adelaide Oval is a shoot-out. Both sides have question marks on their defence, but have the ability to kick a score, given their dominant key forwards. I think we see both teams kick 100+ points and multiple players kick 5+ goals in this one.
The Ultimate Nightmare (Worst Case Scenario)
Two teams feature in this one. Both at home for the first time in 2026, both had disappointing losses in Round One.
It is a nightmare scenario for Justin Longmuir should the new-look Demons venture across the Nullarbor and leave with four points. The Dockers started well at Cat Park last week and then went full Dockery and falling apart. The club and the coach cannot afford the same result in consecutive weeks.
As for the second team, the Power from Port, they sacked Ken Hinkley – who I think is a good coach – and Josh Carr’s first game in charge was an embarrassment for the Power. They are back in Adelaide against the Bombers, who no one knows what they stand for. The Power will be favourites, should win on their home deck, but what if … ? Carr’s job is safe, yes, as it is his second game in charge, but consecutive losses to Norf and the Dons don’t instil anyone with any confidence in his coaching ability.
The Outsider (unexpected winner)
As per the above section, Melbourne is shaping up as a side that could cause issues for contending clubs throughout this season. Their new-look midfield, attacking style, and the ability of new coach Steven King to get the best out of his players, could use this early-season trip as a great opportunity to galvanise together and cause an upset. Can they do it? Absolutely. Will they? That remains to be seen.
The Money Maker (Bold Call)
The Suns beat the Tigers at the ‘G by a three-figure margin. I feel like, at this point, the stars are aligning for the Suns in a lot of ways. They finally travel away from their home ground, so that might take a moment of re-adjustment, but Richmond weren’t particularly inspiring last week. I think the Suns will take this opportunity, on a Saturday afternoon, at the home of football, to flex their muscle and send a message to the rest of the competition.
Essential Result (Must Win)
North need to win this one. Yes, they are travelling West for this game, but after a solid start to the season last week, they get a chance to go 2-0 against the Eagles. This game will be a great test for team KANGA KANGA KANGA to see if they have matured, and if they can string back-to-back wins together and win a game that they would, in recent seasons, lose.
Most at Stake (Vulnerable)
The Saints and Ross the Boss. They splashed the cash, are 0-2, and can’t seem to get the best out of their best players yet. As HB says, watch them in 2027 start to take strides, and that’s accurate. However, the decline thus far is evident, and the game style leaves a lot to be desired. I understand Max King is missing, and I understand Marshall missed last week, but their inability to score is going to hurt them considerably, given the increased offensive output thus far in 2026. The Saints need to fire some shots and they need to start doing so this weekend against the orange team.
The Must Watch (match-up or game)
While they won’t be on each other, Riley Thilthorpe and Sam Darcy loom large for their sides this weekend. They have the height over their opponents, good ball movement up the ground, and these two shape up as key cogs in their sides pursuit of four points.
The Unexpected (underdog performance)
While I don’t see the Bombers winning, I can foresee a world in which their midfield takes it to the Power. It’ll be the Dons ‘ defence that lets them down in this one, though. That said, I’m keen on seeing what Nate Caddy and Archer May can do for the Bombers in this one, and to have them keep the Dons close on the scoreboard.
It’s a Big Weekend For …
Luke Jackson. This might be weird, given his dominant game in round one. However, that was against a debutant. Can he deliver the same output against arguably the game’s greatest ever ruck, who is also in good form, Max Gawn? This is going to be an epic contest, one that will shape the result of the game and could be a legitimate changing of the guard.
The Don (player of the round)
Let’s lock in Ben King, against the Tigers, kicking 7 goals and staking his claim early as the man to beat for the Coleman Medal.
The Underboss (rookie of the round)
I’ve been loving what Lachie Jaques is doing at the Dogs. Providing good dash off half-back, tough, and has offered something different for the Dogs. Looking forward to seeing what he does this week.
Individual Brilliance (predicting a stat accomplishment like x goals or marks)
The Giants forwards will be too strong for the Saints defenders. So, I think Jake Stringer will have some fun, kicking 3+ from 15+ disposals.
The Winners (currently on 7; last week 5)
Hawthorn (I can show the receipts to prove this)
Western Bulldogs
Gold Coast
Greater Western Sydney
Fremantle
Port Adelaide
North Melbourne
Drop us your thoughts in the comments and stay tuned over the coming weeks to see how the Prophet goes with his predictions.
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