Most us will have a childhood memory of a playground involving a see-saw. Without knowing any theory or science, you experienced the physics fundamentals to do with balance and the effects of torque and momentum. Once the balance of that see-saw was compromised, it would take giant shifts of weight and effort to stop one end descending and the other going skyward.
Beware the fat kid.
Was this to be the way of things in teh Round Nine clash between the Brisbane Lions (the very fat kid) and the North Melbourne Kangaroos (scrawny and needs a good feed) played at Ninja Stadium, Hobart. Pregame from the armchair, my prediction was that regardless of what North did, the scoreboard was always going to tilt the Lions way; Lions are heavyweights in 2025 and North are not.
A good crowd of Hobartions (yes, that’s the proper handle for someone from Hobart, I read it on the internet so it must be true. Yes it does sound a lot like Hobbiton, which is a nice little town in Middle- Earth, anyhow, let’s all get a grip.) turned out on a cool and cloudy (who’d have thought being so close to the South Pole) Sunday afternoon, keen to clap eyes on some superstars of the game (Lions) and to watch as they dismember the others guys (North). My spies tell me there were no obvious Ninjas in the stadium, but there was one guy in a black hoodie and ski mask who looked dodgy and seemed to be able to move about without moving his legs. I digress.
Yes there was a game of footy on, and so I will now relate.
The game opened with a Lachie Neale clearing handpass to a running Charlie Cameron who handed off to Jarrod Berry who kicked deep into the pocket of the Lions forward 50. Zac Bailey with a fist halved the following marking contest; the ball fell to Levi Ashcroft who kicked around his body from about 30m out for a goal. 25 seconds of the game had elapsed, a minor galaxy of Lions players had got a touch. Clarkson reaches for the tablets; guessing he took two.
A minute and a half later, Eric Hipwood missed another goal scoring opportunity, and it seemed the fat kid was moving to his end of the plank.
But, North are different this year!
At the five-minute mark, George Wardlaw (gee they missed him earlier in the year) hit up Cam Zurhaar about 25 metres out and he goaled, levelling up the contest. During a scoreless arm wrestle for the next ten minutes, Jarrod Berry was felled in a head clash with North’s Luke MacDonald. Both players left the ground bleeding and Berry, being concussed, was subbed off and replaced by Darcy Gardiner. The clash of heads did appear to me an inadvertent result of players both attacking the ball and possibly losing bearings to other players around them. I hope the MRO has the same opinion. The third and last goal of the first quarter came from Cam Rayner following an uncontested mark about 15 metres out, at the 18-minute mark. The arm wrestle then continued with no scoring for the last part of the quarter and ended with the Lions up by 9 points.
The first quarter demonstrated what would become an ongoing characteristic of this game; a low possession game from Lions prime mover Lachie Neale. This is significant in that he is a giant cog in their machinery and when his impact is down, it’s noticeable. Neale finished with just 17 possessions for the day, which is just under 50% of his typical stats. Some of the space was taken up by Jaspa Fletcher (10 first quarter possessions) Dayne Zorko (7 ) and Noah Answerth (7 also). The engine room players for North were up and about. Harry Sheezel (9), Luke Davies Uniacke (9), Luke Parker (7) stood out and the run and carry of George Wardlaw (7) was proving to be a headache for the Lions.
It became clear that the Lions were not going to be able to simply chew off bits of the North game and run off with the four points. Instead, there was to be a real contest and the Lions would have to get their act together.
The second quarter opened with two quick goals to North from Cobly McKercher and then Wardlaw. North, with great disrespect to the mighty Lions, had hit the front. Then the Lions did get their act together. Eric Hipwood kicked consecutive goals for the Lions that were followed by goals from Rayner and Callum Ah Chee. For the Lions, the impetus came from Will and Levi Ashcroft, Hugh McCluggage, Josh Dunkley and the evergreen Zorko; you don’t keep this kind of crew down for very long, and at half-time the Lions were 20 points in front. I suggest many North fans were sort of expecting this margin, and no doubt a little nervous that things might get ugly in the second half.
In the third quarter, North revealed once again that they are different this year, by outscoring the reigning premiers by three goals (Zurhaar kicked his second, and one each to Dylan Stephens and Nick Larkey) to a single for the Lions off a great kick from the boundary from Charlie Cameron. North still frustrate their supports and totally stress coach Alastair Clarkson due to their superpower of being able to make a total hash of entries into the forward fifty, and to being able to miss easy set shots. For North, goals go begging at times and as Clarkson noted post game he thought they left five or six goals on the park. This is something North really need to improve on, as they have developed goal kicking yips and brain fades near the 50m arc. Better teams than North don’t make these kinds of mistakes. Nonetheless, at the last break, North were just 11 points behind the reigning premier.
The fourth quarter was a treat for football enthusiasts. See-sawing fortunes, lead changes, desperation, big marks, pressure goals. Edge of the seat and shouting at the TV, in my case. Just epic for those at the game, and unlucky for any of you who didn’t think this game would be worth watching.
The recruiting team were likely patting each on the back as star recruits impacted for North when needed. Luke Parker gathered the loose ball in the forward pocket and kicked toward Jack Darling, who is being attended by one of the competition’s best defenders in Harris Andrews. Darling took front position and fell backwards onto Andrews, taking a chest mark.
Goal to Darling.
Lions in front by just four.
The Lions responded with an attack started by Zorko at halfback who kicked to Cameron, who handpassed to Bailey who hit Hipwood on the chest. A very slick answering goal to Hipwood.
Game on; Lions up by 10.
Soon after, Andrews was tackled by Parker at about 45m out from the North goal on the angle. Andrews took exception to the umpires holding the ball decision and after a brief exchange of views the umpire awarded Parker 50m and resulted in another goal to North.
Uncharacteristic from the Lions’ big man.
Lions up by just two points.
Then a loose ball in the goal square fell at the feet of Jack Darling, who toe poked through his second goal.
North up by six points with only five minutes to go; who’d have thought?
A distinct whiff of an almighty upset was in the air. One minute later, Rayner took an excellent pack mark and goaled from about 30; the game was all tied up.
The final five minutes saw both teams score a point in a frantic conclusion to the game. A draw.
No winners.
No losers.
It was fantastic.
North were unable to get the win, yet I thought they looked most likely to steal it. I was very impressed with the game of Charlie Comben who is now regularly taking those defensive intercept marks in clutch moments. He is becoming very good at it. He is gaining confidence, and has become a road block to attacks, especially those that originate from the opposition half-back as he gets time to get in the way. He took half a dozen critical marks yesterday including three in the final quarter that were contested game savers and finished with nine for the day. He has done this stuff before, but not as consistently and not with as much impact.
Sheezel, Davies Uniacke, and Wardlaw continue to grow in confidence and skill and in today’s game, benefited from the efforts of Tristan Xerri, who pretty much own the ruck contest after half-time. For me, Xerri is in All-Australian fettle and has totally found his groove.
It’s hard not to admire the durability of Dayne Zorko. He was the Lions’ best today, just a marvellous footballer. Joining him in the best players were Josh Dunkley and Will Ashcroft.
So, coaching staff throughout the league will be re-assessing their views on North Melbourne. They will be winning some games soon, maybe starting with Richmond next week. The Lions had only a reasonable day, and stars Neale and Andrews did not enjoy their best outings. I’d not be reading too much into this aberration in performance.
They are still a fat kid on the see-saw.
