The Wolfman’s AFL Christmas Wishlist

AFL Christmas Wishlist – What the 19 AFL clubs and the AFL are hoping are under the Christmas tree

As Christmas approaches, it’s time to look at what the 19 AFL clubs (yes Tasmania, too) and the AFL are most hoping for in 2025. While it’s tempting to say an AFL flag for the 18 AFL clubs playing in 2025, I like to think I have a bit more creativity than that.

So keeping that in mind, what do they hope is lying under the tree?

 

Adelaide – Consistency and something to look forward to in September

2023 aside, where a blown goal umpiring call would have seen them at least make eight, the Crows have been pretty much stuck to the bottom rungs of the ladder since their grand final loss to Richmond, which is approaching almost a decade ago.

Sure, they can laugh at their rivals at Alberton not making it past a Preliminary Final, but it’s a bit weird when you can’t even make the finals, yourself.

No more excuses for Adelaide. Alex Neal-Bullen (Melbourne), James Peatling (GWS), Isaac Cumming (GWS) and Sid Draper (Pick #4) will make the team better, and the team has plenty of talent even before those four came to the club.

All the fans want is for the team to put it all together. This should be a team pushing for top eight in 2025, and leave the bottom four 2024 season long behind.

 

Brisbane – Replace the goal output for Joe Daniher in 2025

It’s hard to repeat as the premiers. It’s almost impossible when your best goalkicker is retired. Joe Daniher decided to retire after winning the flag and as much as he’s been a butt of jokes, he’s kicked a lot of goals. In fact, the last two seasons, he kicked 61 goals and 58 goals. In 96 overall games as a Lion, he kicked 204 goals.

That is not a scoring output a team just replaces.

The team signed Sam Day as a delisted free agent, but he’s unlikely to be able to come close to that output. Eric Hipwood needs to finally step up and Logan Morris needs to take the next step. If they don’t, odds are their flag defense will be more difficult than most teams find.

 

Carlton – Some legitimacy as a flag contender

I said no more excuses for the Crows but this is double for the Blues. This is a team boasting an embarrassing array of talent with All-Australian calibre players on just about every line. This is a team that came off a Preliminary Final in 2023, started strong in 2024 and then collapsed.

This is a team that needs to give its fans something after teasing so much.

 

Collingwood – Signs that going all-in wasn’t a mistake

With Tasmania’s imminent entry into the competition, some teams decided the time was right to rebuild. Richmond especially, who were all too keen to hold a fire sale and bet on its crop of draftees coming good by the time Tasmania came in.

The Pies, who looked old (for lack of a better word) in 2024 after its flag in 2023, decided for a different approach. Lacking picks after bringing in Lachie Schultz, it grabbed All-Australian defender, Dan Houston from Port Adelaide, to give the backline some zing.

But teams that go all-in eventually have to go bust at some point, and the Pies have some ageing stars on the home straight of their careers and not as many exciting youngsters as other teams. Going all-in is fine, but it’s riskiest when a team is coming in. Can the Pies show this was the right call?

 

Essendon – Some direction

I must confess, I’ve been a bit confused by what Essendon have done in recent years. It seems every year it flitters between going all-in with free agency, before looking to the draft before trying to bring players in. Even when they go for the plan, it raises so many questions.

For example what’s the plan with Elijah Tsatas and Nik Cox? Does Dylan Shiel have a place in the team? Were the right to give away Jake Stringer when they don’t have a true key forward?

Is this a team aiming for finals or to rebuild? If the former, it makes no sense to trade key personnel as opposed to giving them a two year deal. If the latter, why not go for broke and have a firesale like Richmond?

The team needs to figure out what it wants to do and needs to commit to it.

 

Fremantle – Arrive as a force in 2025

Like Carlton, this is a team with an embarrassment of riches. Excellent young key forwards, an elite young midfield, a solid defense and a strong ruck tandem. An excellent home advantage in the West, and adding Murphy Reid (who some teams had as a top 10 prospect) doesn’t hurt. Neither does the addition of Shai Bolton.

It’s time for Fremantle. This might be the most talented team it’s had ever, and certainly the most talented since their lone grand final.

 

Geelong – A new challenge

Oh look at me, I’m Geelong. I have the best historic home ground advantage in the AFL, a culture that makes everyone want to play for me, and I’m so ridiculously well-run that I find steals late in the draft with almost embarrassing regularity.

I’m so ridiculously well put together it feels like I never fall to the bottom half of the ladder for long, and on the rare occasions I do, it never lasts. Everyone always thinks I’m too old and will fall away but I never do.

Oh, and I just got Bailey Smith at a buy low price.

I’m Geelong, f**k you guys.

 

Gold Coast – September football

I’m critical of the fact that a lot of people treat the Suns as an expansion side in the sense that we see the same thing, there’s a bit of noise about it and then we see the same reports that the Suns will finally put it all together.

And they don’t. They tease it a bit, but they don’t deliver.

The Suns had an enviable home ground record in 2024 and did just about nothing when it travelled. They’re a young team certainly, but there’s enough experience that they now need to do something. We’ve seen rebuilding teams like Hawthorn just pass them by as it is.

 

GWS – Keep Cooper Hamilton on board as a social media guy

Okay, he wasn’t much of an AFL footballer, but PLEASE keep him on the payroll, GWS. Organise a deal with Carlton where he can play with their VFL club, and just retain him for your promos. He can do double duty.

His skits were the best thing about your club. That isn’t an insult, you have a good team and are ridiculously entertaining to watch. The guy was just hilarious though.

 

Hawthorn – Hokball to remain sustainable

Hokball (not sold on the name, but my teams alternate nickname is a fruit so to critique it would be hypocritical) found its stride as they looked unstoppable in the second half of the season unless they played Port Adelaide. But even then, they lost by under a kick in Adelaide both times, so they’re not exactly disgracing themselves even in defeat.

Young teams that come hard out of nowhere generally have two paths. One is to keep trailblazing and become a dynasty, the second is to burn out and figure out how to get it right again. Obviously, the Hawks would like it to be the former.

I won’t bet against them. Hawks for top four anyone?

 

Melbourne – A culture change

Look we’ve all seen it. Clayton Oliver and Melbourne have been teasing a divorce for the last two years, and they so horribly mismanaged Christian Petracca’s injury that the only reason it didn’t go any further was there was no Victorian team Petracca wanted to play for that could even approach a price the Dees would want to listen to.

You can only tempt fate for so long though and a club review is only a review. It doesn’t create a culture. The Dees don’t want to give themselves a self-inflicted wound again in 2025, they’re already faltering on the field as it is.

 

North Melbourne – Some improvement

I’ve seen some try to defend it, but North trading their future first rounder for a pick late in the 20s (and another pick likely to be in the 20s) was not a good trade. Matt Whitlock will have a lot of pressure on him as a result, as will the wider team.

North did look decently competitive for good stretches in the back half of 2024 however. Whitlock won’t need to do much right away because key position stocks take time to develop, but the team itself will need to. It helps at least they got Jack Darling as a key forward mentor, Luke Parker as a midfield mentor and Caleb Daniel to be an excellent distributor off half-back. Getting a former first round pick who hasn’t debuted yet, in Jacob Konstanty, was also an interesting piece of business that could pay off.

They don’t need to do a ton, but surely 5-6 wins isn’t too much to ask for?

 

Port Adelaide – Just some wins

Port fans are an unforgiving bunch and another prelim mishap did not help. Dan Houston left for less than the club said they would give up for him which angered fans, but that was at least mitigated by an excellent draft haul.

But there’s question marks with this team. The team has some questions with who will stand up as a big key forward or key defender, and rumours the team may be handed over to Josh Carr in the future. Is this Ken Hinkley’s swansong? Does the team have something left after losing one of their star players to rivals Collingwood?

This is a team that has the potential to stay top four but also slide. All eyes are on Alberton.

 

Richmond – North to do badly

Richmond don’t really need much. They know they’re going to suck badly in 2025 and so do the fans. But you understand why; short term pain for long term gain. They don’t really need much, given their draft haul was ridiculously good.

Getting North’s first rounder was a massive bonus too, and if North fall behind the pack again, this could be huge. The 2025 draft is weaker than 2024 but there will be some good players, and if Richmond could somehow net #1 and #2? Boy oh boy.

 

St Kilda – Some scoring production

Ross Lyon-coached teams are easy to pick. Excellent defensively, but don’t score. St Kilda filled this role perfectly in 2024. Top four defence in terms of points conceded, bottom four team in scoring.

Losing the dependable Tim Membrey also doesn’t exactly help. The Saints don’t score enough to be a legitimate threat in this competition. Their forward line is arguably worse in 2025. Can someone step up?

 

Sydney – Find a way to go one better

It was a bad Grand Final for Sydney, made worse by the fact they were top of the ladder for just about the entire season. There’s not much to say that hasn’t been said.

Teams that get beaten in the Grand Final tend to do poorly the next year. Ironically, the Lions bucked this trend in 2024, but then again, they were only a kick out of it in 2023. Can the Swans fight back?

 

Tasmania – Get its office and hitlist in order

The Devils are still a while away from actually hitting the field but the hard work is starting now. The bones of the team are taking shape off the field, and they do need to eventually find a coach. The hitlist of players they’ll pursue, and make no mistake they’re going to be doing this even as we speak, will also be taking shape.

They want to hit the ground running, not be a cellar dweller. Getting it right now will save them a lot of agony down the line.

 

West Coast – Chad Warner

Okay, this one is a bit on the nose, but it has to be said. The Eagles trade down from #3 was criticised by shortsighted people who didn’t realise it freed the Eagles up to chase Chad Warner in 2025. They were doubly justified when Bo Allan, the guy they would have at least considered at #3, fell to them at #16 anyway and they even got Jobe Shanahan and Tom Gross to boot.

If they get Chad Warner, they will look like utter geniuses. They have the picks and they have the cash. If they can bring the onfield product to a point where they can sell Warner that success is not far away and actually nab him, it’s an ingenious pursuit.

 

Western Bulldogs – Stop the underachieving

The Dogs are in a weird place. They’re talented, but seem to underperform a ton to the point where you wonder if they’re a finals team. With a team packing this much potential, that’s insane.

Luke Beveridge has made some weird calls lately too, and gets adversarial when questioned by the media. Yes he won a flag, but so did Malthouse and he went down a similar path too.

The Dogs are the big question mark in 2025. I have no idea where they fall on the pecking order right now.

 

AFL – A twilight/night Grand Final

The vast majority do not want this to be a thing, but the AFL really want it to be a thing. Will they pull the trigger, or will they listen to everyone else? GIven their response on the substiture issue, the former is probably more likely than the latter.