2025 Mongrel Crystal Ball
We’ve read the predictions of the best – now it’s time to read those of the rest!
As we like to poke fun at the experts (some of whom are highly paid) who trot out wild predictions, what type of hypocrites would we be if we didn’t do the same and wear the criticism?
Personally, I thought we’d be the coolest type, but the other blokes disagreed, and so, here we are, ready to put our collective knowledge (and wild guessing ability) to the test.
Here are The Mongrel team predictions for 2025 … which may or may not be edited at some point during the season to save face. Just kidding – I had someone send me screenshots last year… can’t get away with that stuff, anymore.
Who will be Premiers in 2025?
Matt O: Fremantle
Matt P: Brisbane
Justin R: GWS
Matt Parnell: Sydney
Slugger: Geelong
Timbo: Collingwood (this has absolutely nothing to do with the fact I am a Collingwood supporter, I swear)
Hodgey: GWS
Disco: Sydney Swans
Jimmy D (Prophet): Geelong Cats (and I’ve probably cursed my club)
Trent S: GWS
HB – GWS
Who will be Runners-Up in 2025?
Matt O: GWS
Matt P: Sydney
Justin R: Carlton
Matt Parnell: GWS
Slugger: Hawthorn
Timbo: GWS
Hodgey: Fremantle
Disco: Brisbane
Prophet: Carlton
Trent S: Fremantle
HB – Brisbane
Norm Smith Medallist
Matt O: Luke Jackson
Matt P: W. Ashcroft
Justin R: Josh Kelly
Matt Parnell: Chad Warner
Slugger: Tom Stewart
Timbo: Nick Daicos
Hodgey: Finn Callaghan
Disco: Tom Papley
Prophet: Max Holmes
Trent S: Jesse Hogan
HB – Tom Green
Name your Top 4/8
Matt O: Fremantle, GWS, Brisbane, Geelong, Sydney, Carlton, Hawthorn, Melbourne
Matt P: Sydney, GWS, Brisbane, Fremantle, Geelong, Collingwood, Carlton, GC
Justin R: GWS, Brisbane, Carlton, Collingwood, Fremantle, Geelong, Sydney, Port Adelaide
Matt Parnell: Brisbane, Sydney, GWS, Geelong, Collingwood, Fremantle, Adelaide, Hawthorn
Slugger: Geelong, Hawthorn, Brisbane, GWS, Fremantle Sydney, Collingwood, Port Adelaide
Timbo: Top 4 in no particular order: GWS, Collingwood, Brisbane, Fremantle. 4th to 8th in no particular order Sydney, Adelaide, Gold Coast, Geelong
Hodgey: GWS, Fremantle, Sydney,Hawthorn, Carlton,Gold Coast, Bulldogs, Adelaide
Disco: Top 4: Sydney, Fremantle, GWS, Brisbane, 5thr to 8th, Collingwood, Geelong, Port Adelaide, Adelaide
Prophet: Greater Western Sydney, Geelong, Fremantle, Brisbane Lions, Carlton, Adelaide, Hawthorn, Port Adelaide
Trent S: GWS, Fremantle, Brisbane, Collingwood, Hawthorn, Geelong, Western Bulldogs, Melbourne
HB – Fremantle, GWS, Sydney, Adelaide, Brisbane – that’s my top five – all Non-Vics this season
Grand Final Headline Performer
Matt O: NSYNC
Matt P: Dua Lipa (not said through optimism but apparently she(?) is Adelaide’s around then)
Justin R: Willy Nelson
Matt Parnell: King Gizzard
Slugger: Pink
Timbo: Keith Urban
Hodgey- Metallica
Disco: Rolling Stones
Prophet: AC/DC
Trent S: Olivia Rodrigo
HB – Sexual Chocolate. I believe the children really are our future…
Who will be Wooden Spooners in 2025?
Matt O: Richmond
Matt P: Richmond
Justin R: Richmond
Matt Parnell: Richmond
Slugger: Richmond
Timbo: Richmond
Hodgey- Richmond
Disco: West Coast
Prophet: Richmond
Trent S: Richmond
HB – Richmond
Biggest Rise (Team)
Matt O: Fremantle
Matt P: Fremantle
Justin R: Carlton
Matt Parnell: Adelaide
Slugger: Gold Coast
Timbo: Adelaide – although I said the same thing this time last year
Hodgey- Gold Coast
Disco: Fremantle
Prophet: Fremantle / Adelaide
Trent S: Fremantle
HB – Adelaide into the top five
Biggest Fall (Team)
Matt O: Port Adelaide
Matt P: Port
Justin R: Western Bulldogs
Matt Parnell: St. Kilda
Slugger: Port Adelaide
Timbo: Port Adelaide
Hodgey- Geelong
Disco: Hawthorn
Prophet: Sydney
Trent S: Sydney/Port Adelaide
HB – Hawthorn and Port
Who will finish top three in the Brownlow?
Matt O: Zak Butters, Clayton Oliver, Izak Rankine
Matt P: N Daicos, Serong, Butters,
Justin R: N Daicos, C Serong, T Green
Matt Parnell: N Daicos, T Green, LDU
Slugger: N Daicos, M Rowell, C Serong
Timbo: Nick Daicos, Caleb Serong, Patrick Cripps
Hodgey- Nick Daicos, Lachie Neale, Patrick Cripps
Disco: Nick Daicos, Lachie Neale, Shai Bolton
Prophet: Jason Horne-Francis, Patrick Dangerfield, Caleb Serong/Will Day
Trent S: Nick Daicos, Christian Petracca, Jai Newcombe
HB – Cripps, N Daicos, Serong. Not sure how you can doubt Cripps… bloke just broke the record in 2024.
Who wins the Coleman in 2025?
Matt O: Jeremy Cameron
Matt P: Jake Waterman
Justin R: Charlie Curnow
Matt Parnell: Dan McStay
Slugger: Nick Larkey
Timbo: Josh Treacy
Hodgey- Charlie Curnow
Disco: Nick Larkey
Prophet: Jesse Hogan
Trent S: Jesse Hogan
HB – Jesse Hogan
Goal of the Year Winner
Matt O: Jack Ginnivan
Matt P: Shai Bolton
Justin R: Josh Rachele
Matt Parnell: Steely Green
Slugger: The Wizard
Timbo: Nick Daicos
Hodgey- Isaac Kakko
Disco: Corey Warner
Trent S: Nick Daicos
Prophet: Nick Daicos, straight in front, from the goal square. The AFL tried so hard to give it to him last year, so they’ll make it happen this year. However, Isaac Kako will kick the best goal of the season.
HB – LDU will shrug three tackles and snap one from the boundary, and lose to a running Daicos goal because Pies fans will flood the vote.
Mark of the Year Winner
Matt O: Sam Draper
Matt P: J Howe
Justin R: Isaac Heeney
Matt Parnell: Mac Andrew
Slugger: Ollie Henry
Timbo: Jamie Elliott
Hodgey: Jed Walter
Disco: Toby Greene
Prophet: Ollie Dempsey – he had a few attempts last year. He will clunk one in 2025.
Trent S: Shai Bolton
HB – Kai Lohmann
Best recruit of the Year?
Matt O: Tom Barrass
Matt P: Shai Bolton
Justin R: Shai Bolton
Matt Parnell: Jack Macrae
Slugger: Daniel Rioli
Timbo: Caleb Daniel
Hodgey- Dan Houston
Disco: Tim Membrey
Prophet: Bailey Smith & Matt Kennedy
Trent S: Dan Houston
HB – Caleb Daniel
Surprise All-Australian
Matt O: Jake Soligo
Matt P: Ollie Dempsey
Justin R: Mac Andrew
Matt Parnell: Tom De Koning
Slugger: Jack Henry
Timbo: Brayden Maynard
Hodgey- Nick Watson
Disco: Jordan Dawson
Prophet: Patrick Dangerfield, as a forward, making him the ONLY nine-time All-Australian
Trent S: Kai Lohmann
HB – James Peatling
Who will be the Rising Star in 2025?
Matt O: Levi Ashcroft
Matt P: Levi Ashcroft
Justin R: Murphy Reid
Matt Parnell: Sid Draper
Slugger: Nate Caddy
Timbo: Ed Allan
Hodgey- Harvey Langford
Disco: Nate Caddy
Prophet: Nate Caddy
Trent S: Sid Draper
HB – Sid Draper
Coach of the Year
Matt O: Justin Longmuir
Matt P: Damien Hardwick
Justin R: Justin Longmuir
Matt Parnell: Whoever the Crows replace Matty Nicks with midseason
Slugger: Justin Longmuir
Timbo: Matthew Nicks
Hodgey- Leon Cameron
Disco: Dean Cox
Prophet: Justin Longmuir – until the Dockers go out in straight sets
Trent S: Adam Kingsley
HB – Adam Kingsley
It’s going to be a breakout year for…?
Matt O: Jake Soligo
Matt P: Sam Sturt
Justin R: Nathan O’Driscoll
Matt Parnell: Ed Richards
Slugger: Elijah Tsatas
Timbo: Riley Thilthorpe
Hodgey- Jed Walter
Disco: Angus Sheldrick
Prophet: Riley Thilthorpe / Shannon Neale / Aaron Cadman – the year of the big forwards
Trent S: Sam Darcy
HB – Mattaes Phill… damn it! Make it Logan Morris or Joel Freijah
Feel Good Story of the Year
Matt O: Fremantle finally wins its first premiership
Matt P: Gold Coast finally make the 8
Justin R: Kozzy Pickett buries his Demons, reunites with family and friends at Freo (Feel good for me, anyways…)
Matt Parnell: Richmond’s gang of teenagers brings optimism back to Punt Road
Slugger: Dangerfield goes out on a high. Premiership captain.
Timbo: Jack Crisp eclipses Jim Stynes consecutive games record – not bad for a set of steak knives
Hodgey- Dogs fans rejoice as Bevo is given his marching orders
Disco: Jacob Hooper and Tim Taranto plays all 23 games for the Tigers and lead the kids to a couple of surprise victories.
Prophet: AFL House listens to the community and has a double weekend focused on Men’s Health, with 50% of all earnings donated to relevant organisations. / Holmes is where the heart is. Young Cat FINALLY gets his Premiership, and Norm to go with it!
Trent S: Cyril Rioli attends Hawthorn training and mingles with the team and officials while the team are in Darwin for Round 10.
HB – Several players voice displeasure with Patrick Dangerfield once again floating shorter quarters and vote him out as AFLPA President.
Headline you will see …
Matt O: Are McRae and Moore the right leaders? Collingwood misses the top eight again, leading the media to question the leadership at the Pies.
Matt P: Fremantle unveils coaching succession plan and Justin Longmuir moves from coach to become head of football.
Justin R: Harley headed home: Former #1 pick has all but packed his bags
Matt Parnell: Carlton discover hundreds of thousands of dollars down the sofa and sign yet more highly vaunted free agents
Slugger: Geelong eyeing first home final at Kardinia Park in over 10 years (they roll this story out every year if the Cats are anywhere near the top 4).
Timbo: Mid-range player rejects multi-year, multi million dollar deal from the Saints
Hodgey- Bunbury a winner as a future location for more AFL fixtures and possible expansion to the southwest of WA, also Matt Rowell extends with GC
Disco: Jason Horne Francis takes Nick Daicos to the cleaners, but Naicos still gets Brownlow votes.
Prophet: Purrfect 10. Dangerfield shakes off early season yips to kick 10 against undefeated Hawks, giving the Cats an epic Easter resurrection.
Trent S: AFL and Players Association clash over mounting injury fears / Fans left in the dark over no FTA coverage on Saturdays.
HB – Essendon are for real (right about Round 12-13)
Headline you won’t see …
Matt O: Port Adelaide backflip. In Ken we still trust!
Matt P: New ‘family tree’ laws allow teams priority over a former player’s niece’s brother in law. Clubs have started instructing players to have kids in order to ensure future success!
Justin R: Richmond wins game
Matt Parnell: AFL removes all compromises from draft
Slugger: AFL to return to a more equitable fixture. Season will be extended and every team will play each other twice.
Timbo: Kane Cornes agrees with 8 year mega deal offered to Harley Reid by VIC club
Hodgey- Harley Reid extends with the Eagles
Disco: Essendon wins a Final – nah, just kidding.
Prophet: Staying Put! Kozzy, Clarry, and Trac re-commit to Dees as Goodwin doubles down on good club culture.
Trent S: Andrew Dillon & Laura Kane praised for common sense and transparent approach to game’s future.
HB – Essendon are for real (right around R24)
