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Ten Things I Learnt After Round 11


1. When Richmond get beat, they really stink it up!

Whilst the Tigers have been super brave and had some amazing wins despite losing key players to injury, the four losses have been ugly.  The average losing margin is 44 points, and two of their losses have been to teams sitting 14th and 15th on the ladder.  This tells me if you can gain the ascendancy early against the yellow and black, you may break the game open and win comfortably.  Or was this week just another case of what happens when a coach parts ways with the club?

2. Pies have had some close calls recently. This loss was coming. 

The Pies struggled to shake off the Blues, the Saints matched them for three quarters before falling away, and then last week they scraped home in Sydney.  So when the siren went on Saturday, and the Pies went down by four points to Freo, most of us observers gave a knowing nod of the head and said we saw it coming.  It might end up being "the loss they had to have"? 

And as for Michel Walters, is there currently anyone more reliable to take a shot for goal to decide the game?  I think not.

3. The Suns and the Blues would possibly lose games in the VFL

The Richmond VFL team currently sits atop the VFL ladder with seven wins from eight games.  I imagine this team would give the Blues and Suns a decent run.  Players like Townsend, Markov, Butler, Graham and Morris would all walk into either one of these two struggling AFL team's best 22.  You'd have to think Gold Coast and Carlton would win the game, but with Brendon Bolton at the helm, the Blues would probably have an honourable loss.

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Look! Mongrel Punt Stubby Holders. Buy one and be cooler than all your friends! It also helps the site out.

4. Lance Franklin is fast becoming a liability for the Swans.

He's now in his 6th season with the Swans. The contract has three years to go. The premiership seems way out of reach for the Swans, and the million-dollar man is having a fairly ordinary year. Just 12 touches and one goal against the Cats and six touches for two goals against the Pies after five weeks off with a "minor" hamstring strain suggests the price tag might be getting high.

That said, I believe the Swans' hands are tied. Let's just hope he can start training more than five minutes a week and get back to his best.

5. The Lions look set to make finals.

The Hawks jumped the Lions early and I was beginning to rue my tip. The Lions of yesteryear would've capitulated after trailing early by five goals, but this side has the belief to overcome a slow start and the youthful fitness to run out games. I believe these two ingredients will see them play in September.

6. Sam Weideman won't sleep well this week.

I feel for this guy. Isn't it crazy that the first thing that went through my mind after watching his set shot from 35m veer left was not that I had tipped Adelaide and therefore I got my tip right, not that it was a poor kick, but what a barrage of negative comments would possibly go his way on social media. It's a sign of the modern age, and definitely not a good one.

My suggestion is Sam to use his phone just to make calls this week and to turn off his Wifi and data. And perhaps the Dees could look more closely at the fact they kicked 1.8 in the last term as well...

7. St Kilda don't win games when they're overseas.

It was Anzac Day 2015 when the Blues took on St Kilda in Wellington, New Zealand. The Blues entered that round without a win for the season but prevailed by 40 points. Here we are four years later and the Saints took on Port Adelaide in Shanghai, China and lost by 70 points. Their average losing margin overseas is 55 points! The next time the Saints depart our shores for an AFL game, I know which way I'll be tipping! (Do I really have to explain I'm taking the mickey here?)

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8. Brendon Bolton may never coach another win ever again.

There are two possible scenarios here: 1) Bolton will be sacked as coach of Carlton, and due to his less than impressive record as an AFL coach, he might not get another gig as head coach again. 2) He coaches out this season and Carlton probably don't win again, and then he's given his marching orders, and you can refer back to point 2 as to what happens after that.

Either way, it's getting near impossible to defend him any more.

9. After a sluggish start to 2019, the Eagles are back in the Top 4 and building nicely.

Another tight first quarter in which the Dogs blew several opportunities in front of goal and should've had a handy lead by quarter time. But from that point on, it was a clinical effort by a well-drilled and very skilful outfit.

As each week goes by, my pre-season prediction of back-to-back is making a solid comeback. The next month should see them cementing their place in the Top 4.

10. By the end of next week, the story will be that Dale Tomas had 53 glasses of wine while smoking meth and dealing drugs outside of primary schools...

We are all terribly sick of this story. When a "former reality TV star" gets involved in tweeting about it, you know just how far we've all fallen. And to think, Daisy gave up his time to raise the profile of a charity event. Yeah, he had a few and made a dick of himself, but no laws were broken.

Next time an AFL player is invited to partake in a charity dinner event, just say "NO"! It's not worth the risk that some no name media dickheads will report on the fact you didn't wash your hands after a piss and that your spineless club will bow to the PC-idiots and sanction you in some way.

RANT OVER!

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